How to choose the right Fraternity

In behalf of thousands of fraternities and sororities around the world, I would like to share some experience on how to choose the right fraternity. There are hundreds and thousands of fraternities out there in locals and international. Fraternity in my country is synonymous to the word violence and why is that so? Because from time to time there are news about victims of hazing and frat wars, while I was in college one of my professors asked us,

“Why would you join a useless organization when you have friends?”

Fraternity (or fraternal organization) is an organized society of men associated together in an environment of companionship and brotherhood; dedicated to the intellectual, physical, and social development of its members says Wikipedia. In my own experience we as members share a common bond, a single aspect in us that tells us we are connected to one another it may not be biological terms but in rituals, ceremonies and a bond that not any of my friends can give; a non-biological brotherhood ties to be precise and my normal friends can’t sustain that ties to me.

“Are you willing to suffer this painful physical and mental torture just to prove you are willing to join?”

Honestly, it’s more on a mental torture and a psychological distress to someone who is on the process of pledge. In Philippines, there is a Republic Act 8049 about the Anti-Hazing law. In my point of view even though we have an Act regarding violence against this activity there are still among the members who can’t just simply follow the rules, some of their reasons are:

• We can’t just simply eradicate the tradition that was passed down from the oldest batch up to the present. (Are you serious?)

• The neophytes should also experience what we experienced before (I shall take revenge on you neophyte I will let you feel what I felt before).

• For them there is no essence in joining if this hazing isn’t functional.

• And lastly, they just want violence.

“Why are they inflicting pain in applicants where in fact they will be your co-brothers and sisters?”

The main reason for this stupid activity is to just simply test a neophyte if he/she really is willing. (What a lame excuse that is)

But don’t you worry here are some few tips how to choose the right fraternity, and a great fraternity should be:

• Understandable – in the sense of how it was founded and the purpose of its existence (not just any other gang on the street to which the sole purpose is to create chaos and public scandal in your local communities).

• Active Listener – in the sense of if you have emergency at home or you are at school, a great fraternity would adjust to your needs rather than you adjust to the fraternity’s needs. (It’s them who needs you)

• Humility – A great fraternity doesn’t step on other fraternity just to reach the top or utter boastful words just to attract neophytes but nothing in deeds and humility should get along well with respect, respect someone’s dignity and reputation.

• Professional – A recognized fraternity National or International and a non-profit fraternity (not just any fraternity that ask money for this and that but is not visible and a questionable funding on where the money will be used), also a non-professional fraternity doesn’t give a value to education and they keep recruiting random members just have quantity not quality.

• Friendship – The way a good fraternity acts in front of their recruits is to wear a good smile while orienting and conducting seminars before they enter the circle to develop friendship, not the ones who inflict random hits to them with the a negative intent. (That’s not just friendly you know)

• Leadership – Not leading them go to the dark side, but rather lead them to success and as a better man. (While I was a Grand Chancellor in my time, we check their report cards at the end of the semester and we recognize their efforts and performance in school)

• Service – Deliver a program of service to fellowmen. (Not within the circle of fraternity only) A great fraternity is to provide something useful to the nation as a fully participating citizen and not a rule violator, a fraternity that provide a program of service and not asking anything in return. (If you want something in return then look for a job that pays your service)

• Standards – Qualities of a good fraternity that could withstand the test of time in which values are prioritized rather than personal interests.

I speak not in behalf of my Fraternity but rather in awareness of those teenagers who wants to be in a fraternity/sorority. I as well is a member of an International Service Fraternity, If I state here the name of my fraternity it would be a bias to others but rather be I would stay silent and I state facts here based on experience and not just random thoughts.

NOTE: It’s not necessary or obligation for a teenage to be in a fraternity. You, yes you, you should at least try to focus in your studies first or career, Fraternities/Organizations are just there. So until then, see you.

Photo credits are to their respective owners.